By Jess Massey, as told to Kelly Burch
I am a productivity coach, host of the Hustle Sanely podcast and a mom to a 1-year-old in Tampa, Florida. When I was newly postpartum I found myself ordering anything and everything that promised to make my life as a new parent easier. Soon, my house was cluttered with purchases, and the mess was making my anxiety spike. I knew I had to stop impulse shopping. I decided to embark on a no-spend month.
When I tallied up the cost of my impulse shopping, I realized I was spending an average of $1,000 each month on things I didn’t really need. That was money I could besaving for my dream of owning a second home in the mountains — a place to escape the brutal Florida summer heat. That house would do more for my happiness and mental health than any impulse buy. After implementing my no-spend month (then repeating it twice last year), I saved nearly $3,000 toward that dream. Here’s how I did it.
The wake-up call
In January 2023, my daughter, Everly, who was about 6 weeks old, was having trouble sleeping. This was nothing new, so I was willing to spend on anything that promised to soothe a fussy baby and get me a few minutes to myself. I clicked "add to cart" on the MamaRoo, a pricey infant bouncer. It wasn’t the first item I’d impulse-bought, but at more than $250, it was the most expensive.
By that point, my house was littered with items I’d purchased to try to make the postpartum period easier. There were dozens of pacifiers, including one that cost about $30. Everly never took to any of them. Our kitchen was full of bottles, because each time Everly refused one, I bought another brand, rather than trying a different position or feeding technique.
By mid-February, I was emerging from my postpartum haze and realized that Amazon was delivering to my house almost daily. I knew that something needed to change, so I decided to try a 30-day no-spend challenge.
I set ground rules for my challenge that would help me stick to it
I had heard about no-spend challenges on social media. Typically they restrict all optional spending for the timeframe of the challenge. You still pay your bills, buy groceries, and have diapers delivered, but you skip out on new clothing, meals out, and any other spending that is a want, not a need.
I decided to craft a set of rules that worked for me. First up, no spending on "extras" or impulse buys. No more baby products that promised me more sleep — I was only spending on household essentials and previously scheduled expenses, like a hair appointment.
I didn’t want to dread the challenge, however, so I made some exceptions. I could dine out once a week, and get coffee twice a week — a big drop from my usual habit of purchasing coffee every day. Those things make me feel like me, and it was important that I didn’t feel deprived. Part of my reason for doing the challenge was to address my anxiety. I didn’t want to add to it by trying to stick to rules that were too strict.
My husband, Adam, isn’t much of a spender, but I told him my plan and he was on board. From mid-February to mid-March we agreed not to spend on all the "little" purchases that were starting to take up a lot of space in our home and in our bank account.
I had to acknowledge my biggest spending problem: impulse shopping.
I’m a competitive person, so once I decided to do the challenge, I knew I was going to stick to it. But for that to happen, I had to acknowledge that I had a serious problem with impulse purchasing.
I own a planning company and I love lists. They bring me mental clarity and peace, so I figured lists would be helpful during the challenge month. When I felt the need to buy something, I wrote it down on a list.
Soon, I could see my would-be impulse purchases in black and white. There were small items, like fluffy pillows or throw blankets for the couch, but there were also much more expensive desires, like an Oura ring to monitor my sleep (cost: $300 or more), baby Nikes for my daughter who wasn’t even sitting up yet ($47) and a wipe warmer ($39).
Spoiler alert: at the end of the month I didn’t need — or want — one item from that list. That was incredibly eye-opening. I thought I needed each of those things, and would have normally shelled out hundreds of dollars for them over the month. But after the urge to buy them passed, I didn’t miss them at all, and truly didn’t feel like I was missing out.
I also removed myself from several store email subscriptions. I realized I was a digital marketer's dream: the loyal customer who would always click through to buy a great deal. In fact, I was doing most of my impulse shopping after seeing these targeted emails. Getting the promotion emails from Aerie or Abercrombie was too tempting to me, especially when I was scrolling through my phone during late-night feedings.
I unsubscribed from registry emails, too. I knew we were all set, and didn’t need any more gear that parenting sites were recommending. But if I saw a great promotion in my inbox, I’d be convinced I needed the latest baby must-have.
Once I unsubscribed, I found it much easier to stick to the no-spend month, since I wasn’t being told by advertising teams that I needed these items to be happy and healthy.
If I found myself tempted, I remembered my why: I wanted to save for that mountain home where I could experience true relaxation with my family, instead of mindlessly spending money on the next baby item that claimed it would offer me a break. The pull of marketing and digital ads is really powerful, so having clarity on why you’re doing a no-spend month — whether it’s to pay down debt, save for a family vacation, or simply become more in control of your finances — is critical.
I felt more calm and present during this challenge
I wasn’t anticipating how much better I would feel mentally. My purchasing was beginning to pile up, literally, and our home was cluttered. This made me anxious and more likely to snap at my husband.
At the same time, I was spending time on my phone, searching for products that would make the postpartum period easier. I’d impulse buy them, and when the packages arrived I didn’t remember what I’d bought. I’d open them and think, "Why did I buy this," which led to a cycle of remorse and shame.
By the second week of the no-spend month, I started to feel more in control. I decluttered our home, donating or passing on items we didn’t need. As the physical clutter cleared, so did the mental clutter. Our home became more peaceful. Adam and I were snapping at each other less, and I had more patience to try different things to get Everly to sleep or take a bottle, rather than just buying a solution. By the end of the 30 days, I felt more present with my family.
I did the challenge two more times, and plan to repeat it twice a year
I had such a great experience with the challenge that I did it two more times last year: once in the summer and again in September. I tweaked the rules a little each time. During the hot Florida summer, I allowed myself to eat out a bit more so I wouldn’t have to cook. But, after buying a coffee machine for home I stopped giving myself a free pass on coffee out.
Adjusting the rules each time made me feel like I was embracing the challenges, rather than depriving myself. It allowed me to spend my money in ways that enhanced my quality of life. In the future, I’m going to do no-spend months before and after the holiday season.
I did make one major mindset shift: rather than calling it a no-spend month, I call it a save month. I like focusing on what I’m doing, rather than what I’m not doing. I would estimate I’ve saved $3,000 over the year, or about $1,000 each month I do the challenge. That’s a little embarrassing since it shows just how much I was impulse shopping. Now, I can be intentional with that money, tucking it away for our cool mountain escape.
Today, my house is less cluttered, my bank account is more robust, and I’m a more confident parent. Those results are more satisfying than any online purchase.
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