Products to Make Postpartum Sex More Comfortable

reviewed mark Medically Reviewed by Katie Ruebush, P.T., D.P.T.  | December 13, 2022
Best Products to Make Postpartum Sex Comfortable
Postpartum Sex Helpers

Sex might be the last thing on your mind when you’re going through postpartum recovery. After all, your body needs time to recuperate after giving birth, whether you delivered via vaginal birth or C-section. Plus, it’s not just physical recovery you’ll need to navigate. Many women experience “the baby blues” for days and sometimes weeks after delivery, which can include anxiety, sadness and trouble sleeping and might not put you in the mood for intimacy. Additionally, sleep deprivation from caring for your new infant as well as being “touched out” from nursing or holding baby all day might also contribute to a decreased sex drive.

And once you are ready to have sex again, it’s possible that you’ll have a few issues to navigate, such as pain and tenderness. Fortunately, there are a number of techniques to help you find relief and products to make postpartum sex as comfortable as possible. And, don’t forget that it’s okay if you still don’t feel like having sex even after getting the all-clear from your doctor. It’s important to take the time you need before getting intimate again, especially if you’re experiencing emotional or physical barriers.

Ahead, we’ll answer a few important questions about having sex after birth, such as how long to wait and what you can expect it to feel like. Then, we’ll get into the best products for postpartum sex, as recommended by experts and the What to Expect community.

When is it safe to have sex after giving birth?

Although there is no set timeframe, it’s typically recommended to wait four to six weeks after you’ve delivered before having sex again, according to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG). Those who had an episiotomy or tear during birth may be told to wait longer, until the area has completely healed. Women who gave birth via cesarean will also have a longer recovery to give your incision time to heal.

You should get clearance from your practitioner before having sex after birth; consider broaching the topic during your first postpartum appointment, which usually occurs three weeks after delivery. And, even if you have the greenlight from your doctor, you should always wait until you feel ready and comfortable, as every person’s postpartum recovery looks a little different.

When you do decide to resume sex with your partner, go at your own pace when. “Just be careful when it’s the first time, go slowly, and do what feels right for you,” says Christine Greves, M.D., a board-certified OB-GYN at the Winnie Palmer Hospital for Women and Babies in Orlando.

What does postpartum sex feel like?

When it comes to postpartum sex, the way it feels can vary from person to person. “For some women, it will feel totally normal,” says Jennifer Wider, M.D, women’s health expert. “For others, there may be some pain involved.” 

Your pain factor may depend on what happened during your baby’s birth, especially if you had any tearing, says Dr. Greves. It’s common to feel vaginal soreness or pain after delivery, even if you had no tearing. For those who did tear, pain during sex might be more intense and longer-lasting. Breastfeeding may also impact postpartum sex: According to Dr. Greves, the decreased estrogen levels may lead to some vaginal dryness, which can cause more friction (and irritation) during sex for up to six and even 12 months after birth. If you’re experiencing soreness or dryness, you can try shifting your position during sex to relieve these symptoms. You might want to try being on top, on hands and knees or laying on your side to relax your pelvic floor, suggests Katie Ruebush, P.T., D.P.T. at Memorial Hospital in Carthage, Illinois. 

If, however, the vaginal pain doesn’t subside in two weeks or you’re concerned about the amount of pain you’re experiencing, you’ll want to reach out to your OB-GYN or physical therapist, recommends Ruebush. It’s possible you may be experiencing a type of postpartum pelvic floor dysfunction in which muscles are too tight. This can result in painful ripping, tearing, or burning sensations during sex. If you and your OB-GYN expect this to be the case, you’ll want to reach out to a pelvic floor therapist who can diagnose you and provide a treatment plan.

Types of products to help with postpartum sex

Because there are several postpartum symptoms that can affect how you feel during sex, experts generally recommend having a few tools handy to keep you more comfortable while being intimate with your partner. They can include:

  • Lubricant or vaginal moisturizer: Both of these products help add moisture to your vagina, which can reduce friction and irritation. While lubricant is good to have on-hand for sex, you can use a vaginal moisturizer daily to help relieve dryness.

  • Perineal spray: Although you may receive a numbing spray like Dermoplast at the hospital, you might want to use an herbal perineal spray to soothe postpartum swelling and ease any discomfort without numbing the area. They usually contain ingredients like witch hazel and peppermint that can be cooling and soothing on any swelling.

  • Nipple cream: Nipple cream, especially one containing lanolin, can soothe nipples that may be sore and cracked from breastfeeding, which can make rolling in bed and nipple play more comfortable.

  • A supportive and sexy nursing bra: You may be hesitant to go braless during postpartum sex. After all, your breasts have been through a lot of changes and may even be prone to spontaneous leaking if you breastfeed or pump. But a quality nursing bra can provide support to make you more comfortable. Not to mention they come in a number of sexy designs to further set the mood.

How we chose the best products for sex after birth

We selected the best products for postpartum sex by scouting out the most popular items on the market, including readers’ favorites. We relied on feedback from our What to Expect community in order to cast a wide net and see what worked for a majority of people, especially since every postpartum experience is different. We also considered product recommendations from Dr. Greves and Dr. Wider, who are able to offer a medical expertise to the topic. We then narrowed down our picks to the best rated and reviewed products and ultimately chose the ones we felt would best serve the needs of new moms. 

Here are our top picks for the best products to make postpartum sex more comfortable, so you can get back into the swing of things. 

Why Trust Us?

What to Expect is the world’s most trusted pregnancy and parenting brand for a reason. Our product recommendations are based on expert parent insight, advice from medical professionals and feedback from the millions of parents and parents-to-be in our community. Our editors adhere to the highest research and reporting standards and our team of vetted OB/GYNs, pediatricians and other health professionals ensure our recommended products are safe and effective for you and your baby.

Best Lubricant

K-Y Personal Water Based Lubricant

Best Postpartum Sex Products: Best Lube Postpartum Sex
Pros
  • Easy to use
  • no sticky residue
  • fragrance-free formula
Cons
  • May feel less slippery than oil-based lubes
Why We Love it
Community Reviews
Why We Love It

Your vagina might feel stretched, sore or tight, especially if you received stitches after childbirth. Using a water-based fragrance-free lubricant, like this one from K-Y, adds the right of moisture to reduce friction, without leaving your vagina feeling sticky. The gentle formula - it's sulfate- and paraben-free and pH-friendly - is ideal for sensitive skin, making it a good choice for not further aggravating your sore vagina. And, because it's a non-greasy lubricant, you won't have to worry about staining your sheets. This 4-ounce bottle also fits perfectly in your nightstand, so you can grab it in a pinch if you're having impromptu sex with your partner.

Community Reviews
  • "Whatever you do though, use lube!!!! I was extremely tight six weeks after birth, which I didn't even think was possible after having a baby exit through there."

Best Sexy Nursing Bra

Hot Milk Temptation Jet Black Nursing Bra

Best Postpartum Sex Products: Best Sexy Nursing Bra
Buying Option
Pros
  • Comfortable
  • easy to unsnap
Cons
  • Limited size range
Why We Love it
Community Reviews
Why We Love It

Moms in the What to Expect community rave about Hotmilk Temptationbras for providing extra support to their heavier-than-usual breasts. Although underwire is often not recommended while nursing as it can push into your breast and potentially cause a blockage, the Hotmilk bras feature flexible underwire that won't be restrictive and will provide tons of support. The wide straps and six fastenings on the band all deliver comfortable support to make you feel secure even while moving around during sex. The full-cup coverage will hold your breasts in while keeping nursing pads secure so you won't have to worry about any leaks while being intimate, too. Overall, the comfort you'll feel in addition to the attractive lace design are both sure to make you feel sexier.

And, if you have to nurse your LO, this bra provides easy access to your chest. Just unclip the soft cups if you need to pump milk or give a quick feeding.

Community Reviews
  • "The ones I liked best last time were from an online store Hot Milk. They held up really well & had good support."

  • "Hotmilk bras are brilliant. So comfortable... I am pregnant again and wearing it all the time because it is so comfortable! I will definitely buy another."

  • "Hot milk are the best if you're large chested, I've gone up to a 36G & have bought several bras & the hot milk are by far the best."

Best Perineal Treatment

Earth Mama Herbal Perineal Spray and Balm

Best Postpartum Sex Products: Best Perineal Spray and Balm
Buying Option
Pros
  • Works quickly
  • smells nice
Cons
  • Bottle can be hard to use upside down
Why We Love it
Community Reviews
Why We Love It

Earth Mama's Herbal Perineal Spray and Balm set that has provided What to Expect readers with relief thanks to its cooling properties. The chemical- and preservative-free essential oil formula includes witch hazel, lavender and peppermint oil, which all contain anti-inflammatory properties to help alleviate postpartum vaginal swelling and soreness. Because sex could further aggravate the already tender area, starting off with this cooling spray or balm will provide instant comfort and relief. The balm is great for anyone who is looking for thicker coverage, while the spray is easy and quick to use, especially because it works upside down. Pro-tip: Store both in the fridge for even more cooling relief.

Community Reviews
  • "I prefer the spray. You don’t have to touch anything and it feels great."

Best Pillow

Sealy Memory Foam & Hydraluxe Gel Bed Pillow

Best Postpartum Sex Products: Best Sex Pillow
Buying Option
Pros
  • Comfortable
  • helps prevent sweating
Cons
  • Isn’t designed specifically for sex
Why We Love It

It isn't uncommon to experience back pain after giving birth, which can be a result of strained abdominal muscles from delivery or simply from bending over and lifting your baby up. Fortunately, this Sealy Memory Foam & Hydraluxe Gel Bed Pillow, helps alleviate pressure points because of the firm memory foam. This material will shape to your body wherever you place it in order to provide ample support and won't flatten even after putting extra weight on it. Rather than having your aching back flat on the bed during sex, using a firm memory foam pillow to provide extra support in whatever spot you need it will make sex more comfortable on your muscles. The pillow's gel top layer also helps cool off your body, so you can rest easy after a steamy session.

Best Nipple Cream

Medela Tender Care Lanolin

Best Postpartum Sex Products: Best Nipple Cream
Buying Option
Pros
  • 100% lanolin
  • good for sensitive skin
Cons
  • Can be hard to spread right out of the bottle
Why We Love it
Community Reviews
Why We Love It

Nursing may lead to cracked nipples, which can be downright uncomfortable during sex. Nipple cream, especially a lanolin-based option such as Medela Tender Care Lanolin, can help soothe pain on the spot. This is because it has a hypoallergenic formula including hydrators like caprylic/capric triglycerides and oat beta glucan that can relieve dry, tender and sore nipples, and you don't have to take it off before breastfeeding. It's loved by moms in the What to Expect community, with many attesting to its ability to remedy and even prevent cracking on nipples.

Community Reviews
  • "I've been using since birth and even though my baby is a terrible latcher it’s prevented cracking."

  • "It goes on smooth and helps relieve cracking. No scent that I can tell, and it's like a thicker lotion — don't need to use much at all to cover."

  • "Do yourself a favor and try this! ... My midwife recommended this lanolin nipple cream. It helped me SO much during those early days."

  • What to Expect When You're Expecting, 5th edition, Heidi Murkoff.
  • What to Expect the First Year, 3rd edition, Heidi Murkoff.
  • WhatToExpect.com, Your Guide to Sex After Giving Birth, December 2021.
  • WhatToExpect.com, Postpartum Recovery Timeline, March 2021.
  • WhatToExpect.com, Pelvic Floor Dysfunction (PFD), October 2022.
  • American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, A Partner's Guide to Pregnancy, November 2020.
  • Christine Greves, M.D., OB-GYN, Winnie Palmer Hospital for Women and Babies, Orlando, Florida.
  • Katie Ruebush, P.T., D.P.T., Memorial Hospital, Carthage, Illinois.
  • Jennifer Wider, M.D., New York City, New York.